As I mentioned earlier, I decided to travel to the United States with the Au Pair program. It’s one of the more popular options among young people. By design, it’s meant to be safe. The program operates in cooperation with the US government. Everything is provided: a car, meals, accommodation, pocket money for outings with friends, medical care, and on top of that, we have the opportunity to study and travel around the USA. Sounds like a fairy tale, right? All these benefits were bargaining chips for my parents. Usually, they were more inclined to oppose rather than support my ideas. I know they did it out of concern, but for a young, energetic person like me, it was initially hard to understand.
As a huge Star Wars fan, meeting Chewbacca was truly special.
Is the Au Pair program a dream come true for adventure seekers? Yes and no. My experiences have been mixed. The first family I chose to stay with seemed perfect, at least judging by their profile on the program’s main website. One child to care for, a beautiful home, a BMW at my disposal, parents who were doctors—what more could one want? The drama began after a week of living with this “perfect” family, and the language barrier didn’t make things easier. I don’t think either I or they were ready for this program.
Freedom and the ability to do what I want have always been important to me in life. Despite having decisive parents who disagreed with many of my ideas, as a student, I was not under their control and could go out and meet whoever I wanted. Here, it was a bit different. The family expected me to spend all my time with them. They didn’t understand why I preferred going out with friends over weekend “family” gatherings. They had no experience with the program and expected me to be like an older sister to Laura—the girl I cared for—and also clean their house, cook, and be on call 24/7. Meanwhile, I was also dealing with a falling-out with my friend and losing contact with a group of newly made “acquaintances” whom I just couldn’t fit in with.The atmosphere there, full of parties, drugs, and other substances, didn’t help either. It was all too much for me, so I decided to change families and locations.
Getting around New York City was no easy task.
After less than three months, I started looking for a new family. It wasn’t straightforward because when the agency opens our profile indicating we’re in the process of changing families, it’s like being labeled as “second-rate.” Many families find this suspicious and are reluctant to take such girls, fearing they won’t meet their expectations or might be problematic. We have two weeks to find a new family; if unsuccessful, we must return to Poland—on our own! I didn’t want to risk anything; I understood that I might not fulfill my “American dream,” and worst-case scenario, I’d return to Poland, which I already missed.
However, I managed to find a new family in less than 10 days. Having learned from experience, I realized I shouldn’t base my decision solely on location. Even though I had to move to the other end of New Jersey, to a town nearly three hours away by car from my beloved New York City, it turned out to be a perfect match. I was responsible for two teenage girls—teaching them basic responsibilities like making beds, preparing meals, or simply driving them to extracurricular activities or managing their free time. We quickly bonded, and it seemed like I could finally start enjoying life in the USA.
With the new family, I quickly started feeling good.
Of course, that wasn’t the case… I still didn’t fit into the program. A lot of free time, a poor location, and lack of friends made me simply unhappy. Back in Poland, I juggled two university majors, two additional jobs, and a rich social life. It was another painful lesson that reinforced the truth of the saying, “The grass is always greener on the other side.”
I wanted to give up, but not this time! New York taught me the most important lesson: “Never give up.” I quickly analyzed in my mind the reasons why I had decided to come to the States and realized that I could still achieve what I wanted. While my English language skills were already communicative, I wanted to improve further. I managed to find a retired English teacher—an American—who agreed to meet with me twice a week to help me improve.
I got a taste of true American life.
Another motivation for my trip was dance classes. It may seem abstract, but since changing locations, I practically went to classes every week. I think a large part of this was due to my choreographer, with whom I took my first lessons. She noticed me among the group, asked me to dance solo, and said many motivational words. Although dance is still an aspect of my life where I don’t feel completely confident, the classes allowed me to fulfill a childhood dream. After several months of intensive training, after completing the Au Pair program, I enrolled in an international dance course at that school, but I’ll write more about that adventure later. Despite many unpleasant experiences, the Au Pair program taught me useful and practical skills, opened doors to new opportunities, and ignited my desire to travel and explore the world. I still keep in touch with my “American family,” and every time I’m in the States, I try to meet up with them.
